[theme]

thebadmovie:

problemsleuth:

[1920′s gangster voice] every single one’a you’s…… every single one’a you’s is valid…….

t’anks boss 

(via spongebobssquarepants)

omny87:

omny87:

Stu, let me ask you a question: how did you not realize until then that you had too many eggs? Nobody sells eggs in a big cloth-covered basket, so you must have done that yourself. That means you spent god-knows-how-long opening up twelve whole cartons of eggs, carefully placing each egg one-by-one inside a big basket, and then covering it with a big picnic cloth… and at no point- at no point- did you ever stop and think “gee, there might be TOO MANY FUCKING EGGS HERE

You really have lost control of your life.

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I may have gone overboard with this

(via brendanjfrye-deactivated2023070)

(via ewokk)

chodeboy:

customer: hi how are you today

me: 

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(via hotboyproblems)

notkatniss:

Hozier be like: life is about DIRT, life is about RELIGIOUS OVERTONES, life is about BOG BODIES, and above all, life is about getting RAILED so hard your soul exits your body

(via cannibalteeth)

techgnosticism:

Human beings be like I must create something or i will kill myself

(via 19cherries)

carldangerous:

Masturbate 👏🏻 that 👏🏻 stress 👏🏻 away 👏🏻

(via brendanjfrye-deactivated2023070)

herzgewachse:

it’s not about wanting to see signs everywhere, but understanding that there are many different types of language. how many times life has talked to me without words

(via backtowoodstock)

delectable-in-red:

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(via backtowoodstock)